Ollie and blossoming humor
Apr 04, 2008 @ 09:44 AM
Ollie
has always been quite a character. He has a "more"
personality... you know, more demanding, more fussy,
more fun loving, etc. He went straight from colic to
being a demanding older baby to being a demanding
toddler! He demands to go outside about 100 times a
day! He asks to play basketball about the same
amount. Those are his favorite activities. Thank
goodness the weather is warming up and we'll be able
to hang out in the back yard. I just hope that his
determination is channelled into positive avenues.
Ollie is observant, and his language is keeping pace with his observations. We were at the playground (he LOVES playgrounds) and he stood in his favorite "post" at the top of the train car (the park has a large, metal train to climb). He watches kids, yells "heyyo" (hello) and basically enjoys himself. He was happily talking to me from afar when he observed, "Ollie uz CI" (Ollie has a CI). Then, he said that Elliot had a CI. I said, "yes, he does." Then he said "grandpa has a CI." (Grandpa has hearing aids, but he will be implanted soon so we just call them his CIs). Finally, he looked at me with a glint in his eye and laughed. "mommy uz CI!" I laughed and said "No, silly, mommy doesn't have a CI. Mommy has glasses." He clearly knew I did not have CIs, but he thought it was a funny joke.
Elliot (7) is beginning to understand more about the fact that some people who are deaf do not have CIs, and that it's important for kids to be implanted early. One evening last week I was preparing to read him a bedtime story and he got teary-eyed. "What's the matter?" He didn't say. Finally after some prodding, he admitted that he was sad that some kids don't get their CIs early enough and that they can't hear and speak easily. I told him that it was sad when that happens, but that his website had helped lots of babies whose parents have contacted us over the years and found out about the benefits of early implantation. That satisfied him, and he wiped his eyes and listened to the chapter of The Spiderwick Chronicles, his current favorite books. One of the difficult things as a parent is knowing that when you attend gatherings with other deaf kids, that realization will be apparent. There will be kids with HAs, kids implanted later, etc. It is all mind-boggling to a kid who has lived very normally and who doesn't think about deafness much. I think it is almost shocking to him to realize how different it can be for those without the advantage of CIs and a very early focus on audition and speech.
I was watching a special on PBS about race in America, and it highlighted the fact that white Americans often never think about their race (or rarely do), but that (due to prejudice and the ramifications) people of color often do. I thought that it was similar to disabilities, really. When someone is allowed to live in a manner that normalizes their experience, so that they don't have to struggle and fight to get what they need, they do not often think about their disability. Not that color is a disability, per se. But undergoing prejudice is. With cochlear implants, a child can hear like his best friend, talk to his grandfather, overhear the weather forecast, apply for a job without asking for modifications, etc. I do not think that Elliot thinks about his deafness on a regular basis. In fact, probably he thinks about it only in the context of when it adds difficulties, such as when he would rather hear during swimming lessons. Now people argue that deafness could be normalized if it was "accepted," however it is a real disability and puts up real roadblocks to success and even safety in a world which is largely filled with hearing individuals. Which is easier... to wake up and go about one's business or to continually endure incidents which "remind" one of the fact that one is deaf?
I have heard deaf adults claim that making life "easy" for kids won't solve everything. No, that's right. But there is no reason do undergo unnecessary difficulties in an age when implantation is so successful. They will still have to create their own way in the world-- develop motivation, become educated, learn social skills-- everything that any human on the planet would need to learn. Life isn't really easy for anyone; but today's deaf child can have the tools to reach their educational and occupational goals!
Ollie is observant, and his language is keeping pace with his observations. We were at the playground (he LOVES playgrounds) and he stood in his favorite "post" at the top of the train car (the park has a large, metal train to climb). He watches kids, yells "heyyo" (hello) and basically enjoys himself. He was happily talking to me from afar when he observed, "Ollie uz CI" (Ollie has a CI). Then, he said that Elliot had a CI. I said, "yes, he does." Then he said "grandpa has a CI." (Grandpa has hearing aids, but he will be implanted soon so we just call them his CIs). Finally, he looked at me with a glint in his eye and laughed. "mommy uz CI!" I laughed and said "No, silly, mommy doesn't have a CI. Mommy has glasses." He clearly knew I did not have CIs, but he thought it was a funny joke.
Elliot (7) is beginning to understand more about the fact that some people who are deaf do not have CIs, and that it's important for kids to be implanted early. One evening last week I was preparing to read him a bedtime story and he got teary-eyed. "What's the matter?" He didn't say. Finally after some prodding, he admitted that he was sad that some kids don't get their CIs early enough and that they can't hear and speak easily. I told him that it was sad when that happens, but that his website had helped lots of babies whose parents have contacted us over the years and found out about the benefits of early implantation. That satisfied him, and he wiped his eyes and listened to the chapter of The Spiderwick Chronicles, his current favorite books. One of the difficult things as a parent is knowing that when you attend gatherings with other deaf kids, that realization will be apparent. There will be kids with HAs, kids implanted later, etc. It is all mind-boggling to a kid who has lived very normally and who doesn't think about deafness much. I think it is almost shocking to him to realize how different it can be for those without the advantage of CIs and a very early focus on audition and speech.
I was watching a special on PBS about race in America, and it highlighted the fact that white Americans often never think about their race (or rarely do), but that (due to prejudice and the ramifications) people of color often do. I thought that it was similar to disabilities, really. When someone is allowed to live in a manner that normalizes their experience, so that they don't have to struggle and fight to get what they need, they do not often think about their disability. Not that color is a disability, per se. But undergoing prejudice is. With cochlear implants, a child can hear like his best friend, talk to his grandfather, overhear the weather forecast, apply for a job without asking for modifications, etc. I do not think that Elliot thinks about his deafness on a regular basis. In fact, probably he thinks about it only in the context of when it adds difficulties, such as when he would rather hear during swimming lessons. Now people argue that deafness could be normalized if it was "accepted," however it is a real disability and puts up real roadblocks to success and even safety in a world which is largely filled with hearing individuals. Which is easier... to wake up and go about one's business or to continually endure incidents which "remind" one of the fact that one is deaf?
I have heard deaf adults claim that making life "easy" for kids won't solve everything. No, that's right. But there is no reason do undergo unnecessary difficulties in an age when implantation is so successful. They will still have to create their own way in the world-- develop motivation, become educated, learn social skills-- everything that any human on the planet would need to learn. Life isn't really easy for anyone; but today's deaf child can have the tools to reach their educational and occupational goals!